Just five minutes.
Hey you, I know you’re busy, but do you have time to talk?
Do I have time to talk? The baby just went down for her nap. The 4yo hasn’t brushed her teeth or gotten dressed yet. She’ll need lunch in about 15 minutes.
When did the dog go out? He should probably go out now. Shit is that the baby crying? No… that’s the tv. What the hell is she watching? No, this has to go. “Yes, I’m sorry honey this isn’t a good show. Do you wanna color? Ok, yes you can have a lunchable but it’s not lunchtime yet, let’s wait a bit. I have to throw in some laundry, I’ll be right back.” Why didn’t I sort the laundry already?
When is my article due? Did I pay the mortgage? Why am I just sitting here? Do I have time to talk? I should call her back.
Hey, do you have time to talk?
Crap, we didn’t FaceTime mom last night and I told her we’d call. Ok laundry is in, now dishes. Is that the baby…? Ugh, please sleep for like 30 more minutes. “Yes, I’ll get your lunchable now. You do have to eat the oranges. No, I’m not opening the chocolate until you eat the fruit too. No, I’m sorry, please sit and eat. Get down from there please, come eat the lunch you just asked for.”
Do you have time to talk?
“Please get down. Come eat your lunch. Don’t make me say it again, just come eat. It’s chicken nuggets, you like this one.” Where is my to-do list? I really want to keep up with my goals. I feel like I just keep making excuses to not get things done. I really want to write that… damnit that’s the baby.
“Why isn’t your lunch gone yet?” Ok what’s for lunch for the baby… why is the dogs bowl empty? How long has it been empty? Poor thing. Ugh they want that edit by tomorrow morning! Why can’t I just say no? “Yes, sure thing. Have a good one!” We need wipes. And fruit cups. And milk. And something for dinner, what’s for dinner? I should take something out. Oh, the laundry is done I gotta switch it before I forget. Why was I down here? “I’m in the basement I’ll be right up, can you just give her her water? I’ll be right there!” Why was I down here?
Do you have time to talk right now? Or can you call me later?
Did I switch the insurance? I think that deadline was today or tomorrow, I’ll have to check. Ok just finish that article real quick. “Get down please, honey, can you get your sister down? Please, on your bum. Can you please help her down from there? Ah, honey! Bum! Ok, come here, oh someone smells poopie!” Omg what did I feed her? How do I still not know how to change a friggen poop diaper why do I get this shit all over me and the changing table?! God damnit.
I just want to sit and watch like 30 minutes of TV. I need to turn my brain off. “Hey after this show, it’s mommy’s turn. Yup, you’ve been watching TV all day honey please don’t give me a hard time. We’ll go outside after, ok?”
Do you have time to talk?
Oh dinner! That’s why I was downstairs! I know buddy I’ll take you out right after I grab something for dinner. We had beef last night… chicken? We had chicken the night before… but that was pasta, maybe we’ll do veggies and rice tonight. Yea that’s fine. Damnit I didn’t pause my show. Oh well was I really gonna watch it anyway? “Buddy don’t bark, that’s the UPS man. Leave it. Leave. It.” Alright where was I… my article. Ok just stand here and do it bc the 1yo is not going to stop climbing. Don’t even try to sit. Oh eat lunch, you haven’t eaten lunch yet. We never have anything for lunch. I’ll have a peach. “Oh, buddy, sorry let’s go! Outside! No, honey, I’m not taking everyone outside right now, he just needs to go potty. Yes after I finish work we’ll go outside.” What was I doing?
Hey, I know you’re probably tired but do you have time to talk later?
Shit, that’s the pediatrician calling, probably to tell me I didn’t switch the insurance. I need to do that right now.
Perfect, there's 45 minutes gone. Ok, what was I doing before? How did you poop again?! What the hell are you feeding her? “Honey, please pick that up. Your lunch trash. Please take it to the kitchen. Thank you.” My article, yes. Ok, what was I supposed to write about? Where’s that email? Why did I put it away? Ah, ok, yes.
“Hey babe. Chicken. Grilled with veggies and rice? Yea. Ok, yea they were pretty good. She took a two-hour nap. We need milk. Did I put that stuff on the list? No tomorrow is fine you don’t have to go out now. I feel like I’ve been running around all day but I have no idea what I’ve done. Oh the laundry in the dryer, that’s your work shirts and stuff.”
Yessssss, it’s the home stretch. Dinner, bath, bed. Yes, yes, yes. We’re definitely watching that movie tonight. “Please eat your dinner. I know you had chicken for lunch honey, I’m sorry. But this is different, it’s grilled. Yes, you do like grilled chicken.” Omg the 1yo. “Please stop feeding the dog, babe can you put the dog in the living room? He’s over here sneaking her food.” We should skip bath tonight. Omg you did not poop again! “Thanks babe, she pooped twice already! I have no idea. Bananas, rice, apples, and toast tomorrow.” “You need to eat your dinner if you want ice cream. We have to call Grami tonight, ok? Don’t let me forget.”
Ah, yes, bedtime. The best time. “Ok gimme a kiss honey, love you.” Why is this baby taking so long to go down tonight? Please just go to sleep. You know I want to watch that movie, don’t you? I don’t even want to watch it anymore I just want to sit and do nothing. I should do half those edits tonight anyway. Please go to sleeeeeep. Pleeeeaaaasssse. Why won’t she sleep? I hope he comes in to take over… I’m getting pissed and she can definitely tell. Oh thank god. “Yes, thank you babe.”
I don’t even want to do these edits right now. I need to stop. How is it 8:45 already? Oh, he’s coming down. Thank God she’s sleeping. It’s too late for that movie. We should just put on The Office. Omg have I sat down for more than 10 minutes today? This is so nice.
Do you have time to talk?
Do I have time to talk?
I guess so. But I just don’t have the brain space. Sorry.