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How to Deal with People Who Are Disrespectful in a Relationship

Joscelyn Kate
4 min readApr 12, 2023

People who are disrespectful in a relationship lack boundaries. Establishing boundaries is usually easier in a new relationship, but what happens when you need boundaries in an existing relationship? New boundaries can be scary to present and enforce especially in long standing relationships.

In an effort to avoid awkwardness or disconnection you may try to accommodate unwelcome behaviors until you figure out how to gently ensure the other person respects your new boundary. Or until you figure out how to avoid the smear campaign they may launch. Both leave you in difficult and exhausting positions.

Clarify Your Feelings

Before setting boundaries with someone, you’ll want to gain clarity on why you’re setting the boundary. This will allow you to feel strong and confident if push back occurs. Take some time to explore your thoughts and feelings. Journaling is a great way to self-reflect and openly discuss how you view a situation.

You could also talk to a trusted friend or therapist that can help you sort through your feelings and the needs behind them. When you feel clear on your feelings, needs, and the boundary that will support you, you’re ready to talk.

Prep Yourself

You are worthy of your feelings. You are deserving of your needs. You are entitled to take up space.

Your boundaries are for you, they’re not meant to benefit anyone else. Setting boundaries can feel selfish, you may have guilt or worry about what other people will think. This is normal, so prepare yourself to face this normal circumstance by boosting your confidence with some self care. Use affirmations, spend time with people you connect with, do something you love.

Taking care of yourself before having a difficult conversation allows you to feel grounded and worthy.

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Joscelyn Kate
Joscelyn Kate

Written by Joscelyn Kate

Mindfulness, Trauma Recovery, Empathy Processing. TheMiddayLatte.com

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